Reflection Of Life
Its 12.30am on the Tuesday morning. Can't sleep with lots to worry about. Work, finance, working relationship, time and the most importantly, My Life. Recently, my life have sunk to an all time low. Living a life as a bachelor most people think is a blessing and freedom for granted, but for people like me, when struggle through life alone, constantly fighting against the tide, looking back where you realise that you are alone against the sea, sometimes you wish to stop fighting and set urself adrift. Sometimes I feel like I am standing alone in the world, among the crowd yet still feeling like I am looking through the spy glass. Many lives come and go oblivious to their surrounding. As I stands here observing people around me going through their daily lives, I am amazed at times where people are just so engrossed with the notion of earning money, that they can forsake all their lives.
Then they are some who takes things for granted. Living in their own little shells hiding never go out to venture into a tough real world ahead. I am so taken back with some people who can be so ignorant and so arrogant with their life that you wish life itself will deal them a joker and throw them into the fray. Will they make it out alive ? Perhaps not. Most individuals that I met in everyday life, well most are either materialistic or individualistic. Some sadly have been swept away in the angry current of money making and work loads.
Maybe that is the life here in England. My life here in a foreign land. Know nobody and feel like a stranger in an alien world cut off from all the familiarity and security. The feeling of vulnerability and hopelessness. What is the point being successful when you are living a miserable and lonely life ? A life on your own where there's no one cares whether you live or die. Many have said it is easy to hook up with someone and find a companionship. Is it so easy as it seems? Is it worth the trouble or is it just a waste of time? Maybe it is the time just to think it through, putting some effort into it and pull my guts together. Heck...I just can't be bothered with such stuffs...!!!
Though being here far from home, they are a few friends that I can say really worth being with Lena and Mandy, they have been really sweet and fantastic to be with. Even by talking in the phone, they pull you into their life, making you feels like you are a part of their life. Then there is my really dear friend of mine, Dee, a friend that I grew up with, though we seldom communicate, everytime we meet up, it is a pleasurable moments. Things that we talk about, everything under the sun, bringing up the best of everything and it is so entertaining and laughter. Reminding me, sometimes you have to look at life at a different angle. Thanks Dee.
Then came a stupid, perverbial, obnoxious and twister individual that I called my bro. I can't stand him at times. But then he got that damn charm that really pissed me off and make me feel darn itchy fingers to really tweak his ears. That demented bugger. Surprisingly he grew up from a shoddy SOB to a rather ....damn...lost of word....well...rather nice asshole....hahahahhaha....lol...oh he gonna love this. Damn discredited my first blog......from an innocent rant to a full blown porn....damn him. Well....that all the compliment I can give you....now shod off....hehe...woi...had a good laugh that day. Haven't laugh that hard for bloody ages...!!! Can't remember when is the last time I've laugh that hard. =) Thanks a lot you bloody idiot. I think he gonna rip this apart as well....
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oh wow! i was blown away